Rains
by Ann2
Summary: Tifa's life after meteor incident. This fic about her relationship between she and Cloud. My frist attempt. Please R&R.


**Rains **

_Revise by Vampiric_

Disclaimer: Cloud, Tifa, Cid and Shera have never belonged to me. And the poem is doesn't belong to me either. I copied it from a book that was published by Yaimai Publishing.

  
Rain is falling like crying of sky.  
My teardrops are falling like raining from my eyes.  
Raining looks so sad but fresh in that line.  
Crying mean sadness not freshness, not survival.  
You make me falling  
Raining in my eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The sky was filled with black clouds as it began to rain heavily. The wind blew the window open, blowing raindrops into the room. 

The two women sitting the room looked up at the noise. The first, a woman aged around thirty, shoulder-length hair was gathered and tied neatly with white bow behind her head, and the second, a young woman with longer, darker, and more ragged hair, glanced at each other awkwardly.

"It's raining today" The first woman said as she struggled to close the window, shivering with the cold. 

Before she would do it, a soft voice stopped her. "Please don't." She turned to the face the owner of the voice.

"But you will catch a cold, dear" Shera said to the younger woman.

"Don't worry, I'm a tough girl," The young woman protested. "Really, I am-"

Shera shook her head and shut the window. "Not anymore, Tifa. Not anymore." She gave her an apologetic look. "Honestly, if I hadn't known you before, I would never have guessed that you could be Tifa Lockheart, one of those heroes that saved the world. You've changed so much"

The younger women chuckled bitterly at the comment. She knew that what Shera had said was true. She looked like shit. Her hair that once shone even in the absence of light was disheveled now, her face was pale and worn out. The shirt that she wore seemed more brown than white, as she hadn't bothered to wash it in a while. Still, Tifa half-heartedly argued against the facts.

"I'm not a heroine, Shera. Don't compare me to one. The true heroine was Aerith"

Yes, she thought again for the millionth time, the true heroine was no one else but Aerith. She sacrificed herself to save the planet. Her sister, who died under the hands of the maniac ex- General named Sephiroth. She still remembered exactly what had happened at the moment of Aeris's death. It haunted her dreams. Had been haunting them for a long time.

For her, it seemed liked yesterday. She remembered when she first saw Aerith at Don Corneo's mansion, before Sephiroth killed her. She could still see every little detail of when Cloud had laid her body in the clear blue water in Forgetting City. Though he did not cry, his face had seemed like a mask of ice, pale and emotionless. She remembered how she tried to speak to him about it after that, but never once had he responded to her. He had kept to himself for a week then he had suddenly announced to the rest of Avalanche that he had decided to follow Sephiroth to continue what Aerith had done, and to personally avenge her death.

Tifa sighed deeply. After the meteor incident, Cloud had told her that he would travel around the world and left, just like that, leaving her to take care of his house and Chocobo ranch. She had tried to persuade him to change his mind, but she had failed. Just like all the other times. 

After that she had sold everything and moved to live in Cloud's old house, wanting to surround herself with everything, anything that he had touched, felt, loved. She left his room like it used to be, telling herself that one day, he would come back. What a fool she had been.

Shera and Cid came to visit her a month ago, demanding to know when she and Cloud would finally go get married. When they found out that Cloud had already left her and saw the state she was in, they had insisted that Shera would stay with her until she got better.

Better? Better from what? She wasn't sick. Only broken.  
  
She lifted her legs to her chest and wrapped her slim arms around them, bowing her head down against her knees. She fell into her memories of the day Cloud had left her.

Alone.  


_Flashback_

_It was a normal day. She was about to go shopping for groceries and stopped by Cloud's house in order to ask if he need anything, like she usually did. Actually, she just used the reason to visit his house as much as possible, but he didn't have to know that._

_She knocked on his door, but there was no response. Worried, she hurried to his chocobo ranch, hoping that everything was all right. She found him there, loading packs of equipment onto his black chocobo, Gordon._

_For several minutes, she silently watched him leave, standing motionlessly behind his back._

_"Cloud" She called softly._

_Cloud jumped. "Tifa, is that you?" Cloud seemed startled by her voice; he turned around to greet her and smiled at her sheepishly. _

_"What are you doing?" The brunette asked, though she knew what the answer would probably be. She set her jaw firmly, refusing to believe in the anxious thoughts that invaded her mind. Cloud wouldn't leave her alone. Cloud couldn't leave her alone. _

_Could he? _

_He said nothing for a long time before replying to her question calmly. "I'm leaving, Tifa. And I want you to keep the ranch and the house. I probably won't be back."_

_Her calm fa?ade shattered. "WW...Why, Cloud? Why are you leaving?" She cried. _

_She too stunned to even hear her own question, too stunned to move, too stunned to think. Cloud wouldn't. Cloud couldn't. This wasn't happening. After they met and shared everything together, just when she had thought that they could finally live happily ever after  
  
"" Cloud turned his back on her, not answering her question, and resumed packing his belongings onto his chocobo._

_The brunette walked toward him, determined to stop him from leaving. She reached out, spun him around, and forced him to meet her eyes. _

_"Cloud-"_

_"Don't touch me!" He yelled, jerking away from her hand._

_Tifa stared up at him with wide eyes. She took a step back, crossing her arms over herself. She blinked back tears, clenching her teeth and trying to stop herself from shaking._

_I won't cry. I won't cry. I won't._

_Cloud immediately looked regretful. He hadn't intended to hurt her. "I'm soSorry. Please forgive me. But I must leave. Before I ever use you as Aerith's substitute. You are my closest friend, Tifa. You are too much important to me for me to use you like that." His voice was broke. "Please, just let me go my own way. This is the best way for both of us-"_

_"No! Cloud, I can't let you go," She pleaded, unable to keep her voice from wavering, " I don't care if you use me as Aerith's substitute. I don't care if you hold me, and pretend that Aerith is there. I just want to be with you. Please, don't go." Overwhelmed with emotion, she flung herself into his arms and held on as if she would never let go._

_"Please," she sobbed, burying her face in his chest. "Please, please, please"_

_Cloud pulled her from his body gently, grabbing her shoulder, raising her face, and forcing her to look up at him. "Listen to me, Tifa. I don't believe that you wouldn't care if I used you as a replacement. If I stayed, it would torture both of us for the rest of our lives. I cannot repay my most important friend by using her for my own selfish desires. And" He paused for a minute, swallowing hard. "And the most important thing is I don't love you like I love Aerith. I'm sorry, Tifa. I tried, I really did, I just can't-"_

_Truth to be told, he hated himself for the last sentence. He saw her soul wither inside her body, all the blood in her face draining away, leaving her skin as pale as Vincent's. _

_Finally, Cloud released Tifa's shoulder. She collapsed onto the floor like a rag doll, a doll whose unmoving features displayed only pain. It seemed as if she cut herself from everything in the world, from any emotion, and from any truth. _

_And it was true. The only things that echoed in her head were four distinct, piercing words._

_He never loved me. He never loved me. He never loved me._

_Cloud turned his back on Tifa once more, not able to bear seeing the girl like that. One day, she would meet someone else, someone better, someone that could love and treasure her like he would never be able to. Someone who could heal her broken heart and make her laugh again. _

_Comforted by the thought, he let Gordon pass Tifa without taking a second glance. He closed his eyes, turned Gordon north, and took off, his last whispered goodbye ringing dully in her ears._

_"Goodbye, Tifa I wish things weren't this way."_

_And she sat, limp and lifeless, drowning in a pool of her own misery._

_End of flashback_

"Tifa Tifa? Tifa!" Shera called. The older woman's face filled with worry and sympathy as she waved a hand in front of Tifa's face. The brunette was drawn to the present by Shera's voice. She smiled to the older woman weakly. 

"Thank you very much for staying with me, Shera. You have no idea how grateful I feel for you staying by my side when I feel" She stopped, shaking her head. "But you don't have to worry about me so much. I'll be all right. I'm sure I will. I promise not to kill myself or anything dramatic like that." 

Shera half-smiled. "I know you won't, Tifa. But I still worry about you"

"Believe me. All I need is time to deal with this. Then I'll get on with my life I just need to think a little, is all." Tifa forced a broader smile for Shera. 

The older woman just watched the younger silently, her expression unreadable.

"What is it?" Tifa asked.

"I think that you are a heroine too, Tifa. Even if you say that you aren't the person who truly saved the world, I admire your strength and optimism so much I wish I could have half the strength that you use to have." Shera laughed. "Then I could probably force Cid to fix that back door that's been broken for ages." 

Shera stood, picking up the empty teacup from the table and headed for the door, turning the lights off on the way. "You should get some sleep, Tifa. A long rest would do you good."

"Thanks for your kind words, Shera. They mean a lot to me." Tifa said, without looking at her older friend.

"You're welcome. I'm glad to help." 

When Tifa heard the click of the door sliding shut, she exhaled deeply and the tears fall freely. 

This wasn't how it was supposed to be. Everything was wrong. Everything she had ever loved had been torn from her, leaving her hanging on to sanity by a thin, invisible thread. She had slowly climbed her way back into life, dragging herself up, inch by agonizing inch.

She looked up at the rain, falling from the dark clouds in the sky. 

She knew now that he would never come back to her. She knew now that it wasn't her fault. It wasn't anyone's fault. He was gone, just searching, like her, for a way to be happy. She would forget him, someday, somehow. She knew she could.

But today, the rain was there with her. Today, she had a friend, one who understood and sympathized, soothed and comforted. 

Today, it was raining.

  
Today, she could cry.

~Owari~

A/N Note: I just want to thanks everybody who read and will review this story. This is my first fanfic. I really want to know what you think about it. Please review. And Thanks you so much Vampiric for such a good reviser. I really love you so much.  



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